23 November 2016

What does "being attractive" mean to you?

I have a young daughter and I've tried many times to have this very conversation with her.  In today's world, how do you go about defining what it means to be attractive.

We live in Germany, a very northern Eurocentric country.  Women are considered most attractive when they are pale, tall, slender, with straight blond hair and blue eyes.  Which doesn't leave much space for those who don't fit that description.  My Sina doesn't fit this description, with her mostly ginger curly long hair and green eyes.  She is a beauty no doubt, just not what is considered attractive here in Germany.

I've talked to many different people, about what they find attractive and what qualities they value in appearance.  The one thing that I've learned, is that when you ask the individual, away from the masses, the definition of what is attractive varies and becomes a much more interesting discussion.

On Stardoll, you tend to see the type of attractiveness being pushed as being very Eurocentric.  These tend to be the dolls that win Covergirl and normally place highly in Stardoll's competitions.  (This years MSW being an amazing exception.)  You can't blame dolls for mirroring exactly what the fashion industry gives them.  A picture of the world's beauty being based on Eurocentric values, even though Europe truly represents such a very small part of the world.

So you begin to wonder... where are the rest of the people left?  Those that don't fit those narrow standards given to us by the media and the fashion industry.  Can these people also consider themselves attractive?  

I will just tell you what I told my daughter.  If there really was one standard of beauty, those women who fit that mold would be really tired at the end of the day.  They would be exhausted from being chased around all day, because they were the only ones who were considered attractive.

But this is not the case, because we all find different things, different features attractive.   No matter what Vogue or some British University will try to tell you, there is no standard or formula to being attractive.  Just look around you!  The people you love, the people you admire, the people you find beautiful and attractive, I am sure most don't fit a formula.

 Don't get caught up in the hype.  And don't let some set of ridiculous rules determine your worth.  We are all different!  And I thank the stars for that.  How boring we would all be if we looked the same, thought the same, acted the same, and were attracted to the same things.

When you comment on this post, do not make the mistake of trying to figure out which of these dolls you find more attractive.  This is not a contest.  I picked these dolls, because they all had something special and individual about them.  Please don't reduce them to faces that need to be judged, by picking out some, you automatically exclude the others.  They are all attractive, in their own way.

**btw, I wish Stardoll would allow for us to have more control of our doll's size.  I am petite and I love it.  My daughter is tall and she loves that.  I have friends who are full-figured and they love their bodies.  The world is made up of many different flavors. 

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